Quotes

[Monster]

"the only way to live forever, is to share your soul with the ones you love"

[eastcoastdrifter]

"Even when Im in a Crowd, Im alone"

[funkymonkey]

"oh my god, its so big!"








...
thank you, thank you... I'm here all week http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Wally]

worst three word statement a bloke could hear:

"Is It In?"

[decoyslikecurves]

fear the totem pole!






















http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/dcimages/4/8/4/3/78532.jpg

[Sprinterboy]

"My cats breath smells like cat food"

[dori_86]

" its not wether you win by an inch or a mile, it's if you win that matters" http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif ha ha ha

[Dish]

"Yeah......They'll do that"

[aaaaah]

"I'll practice you!!!"

or along the same lines

"I'll plug your hole!"

[mumblezzz]

Drift Happens...

[VIC_AE86]

I dont have Neighbours....


I have witnesses...

"Ka Boom Tissshhh"

[eastcoastdrifter]

I'M a Mog
half man
half dog
Im my own best Friend

-bARF (spaceballs)

[eastcoastdrifter]

In Emptiness exists Good but No evil
Wisdom is Existence.
Priciple is Existence.
The Way is Existence.
The Mind is Emptiness.

Shinmen Musashi

[OBE353]

"I ate a big red candle" - Brick
"the human torch was denied a bank loan" - Ron

[dori_86]

" 'san diego' means whales v****a" - Ron Burgandy

[ae86]

Well, your damned if you do, and your damned if you dont - bart simpson.

truer words have never been spoken =^.^=

[indi]

Bite off more than you can chew and chew fast.

That's my moto http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/wink.gif

[CAE86]

Just because your car is sideways, doesn't mean its out of control

[crazy86]

"I have misplaced my pants"

Homer Simpson.

[aaaaah]

"I from Canada, they think I slow ay"

Simpsons

[flamingheads]

"Eagles may soar but hampsters dont get sucked into jet engines"

[Sprinterboy]

"The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."

[eastcoastdrifter]

"there is no such thing as good and evil, just point of view"

[aaaaah]

See my signature.

[Dorio86]

This was on the first season of the simpsons and I think one the funniest quotes.


Lifts up the phone - "Operator, give me the number for 911" Homer http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Peripheral]

"What?! You pooped in the refridgerator? And you ate the whole wheel of cheese?!?!? Gosh... I'm not even mad. That's amazing" (He was talking to a dog)

[Peripheral]

"Dude... You just f**ked your ferrari"
"It's ok... It's not mine"

[dream2drift]

(throwing arms in the air)
"I don't have veins...i don't even have any arms!"

(A drunk mate Tom)

[Peripheral]

HAHAHA... I forgot my favourite
"You'll have to speak up. I'm wearing a towel" - Homer Simpson

[ae86]

another homer quote..
*singing* cats in the cradle and the silver spoon... yes, we have no bannannas..

-
another fav -
Boundaries dont keep people out.. they fence you in..

[crazy86]

guns dont kill people, I kill people http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/ph34r.gif

[indi]

Before you criticise someone walk a mile in their shoes........ that way when you criticise them you're a mile away and you have their shoes! http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif





An oldie but a goodie, I still can't say that joke without cracking up laughing no matter how many times I hear it. http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[indi]

My sister - "I wonder if cows eat frozen grass?"
Me - "Oh my god that's exactly what I was just thinking!"
Our Dad - "Okay that's it I'm pulling over and you are both getting the hell outta my car because you're both crazy!"

[aaaaah]

hahaha Indi.

"Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time... I think I've forgotten this before"

[indi]

What show are these from?

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Max.
Max who?
Max wants to come in and go crazy!
You see now that's not really a joke is it? Because its not funny.
It is if you know Max!
But I don't know Max.
If you did you'd be laughing!


Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?

And LO! I've created a nice pie! Mmmmm blueberry. Of course King Arthur will want some of my pie, so will his knights, greedy pigs..... I know I'll eat it in the dungeon and it will be yummy and good and all mine!

[crazy86]

Originally posted by indi@Nov 24 2005, 02:04 PM
Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?
Now, I know this one...... but where from!!!! I Cant Remember!!!!

[indi]

I am the great Wally Llama knower of all that is knowable.

[RedSuns]

"tell your tits to stop staring ay my eyes!!"

[eastcoastdrifter]

"some people call it harlem but i call Glenfield

[DRiiFT_King]

my cousin sent me this in a email
"if drifting was kool then i guess u would fit in somewhere but my vn goes harder then your ae86 lolwtfbtwbrblolbbq"

i think the only funny thing about it is the part where he owns a VN

[dori_86]

"i cant believe i ate the whole thing!"
-homer simpson

[xolent]

Ohh, look at me. I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man, from happyland! In a gum drop house on lollypop lane...

[xolent]

Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul

[DRFT - 86]

'ahh man... u wouldnt wanna quote me on this one..'

[dori_86]

"it will only cost $200 to fix"
lol yeah sure it will http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Blood Child]

"Uh oh spaghettios"

[eastcoastdrifter]

WILLY WONKA: You can suck 'em and suck 'em, and they'll never get any smaller.

[eastcoastdrifter]

The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it.

[mc68]

"the first time you can't make it a second time isnt as bad as the second time you can't make it a first time"

[eastcoastdrifter]

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
Napoleon Bonaparte (1769 - 1821)

[eastcoastdrifter]

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

[Peripheral]

"You are the cancer of this planet... You are a plague"

[sic86]

"Granny Shifting not Double Clutching Like You Should"

Thank-you Fast & The Furious

[sic86]

I live my life a quarter pounder at a time. And for those 500 calories or
more, I'm free.

I need FRIIIIIIESSSSSS! Two of them. The big ones. Oh, and I need them
tonight!!

AMATURES DONT SUPER-SIZE! I'VE SEEN HOW YOU EAT!!! YOU'VE GOT A BIG MOUTH!!
YOU'LL BLOW YOURSELF UP!

What's the retail on one of those?? More than you can afford pal, 6-dollar
burger!

You're lucky the double shot of bbq sauce didn't blow a seam on your nugget
box!!!

Whoa! There she is, 2 pounds of pure MickeyD's beef. My dad ate it in 9.0
seconds flat. There was so much special sauce, the juices actually dripped
onto his chin coming off the line.
What's your time?
I haven't tasted her. She scares the crap outta me.

My grill topped out at 140 degrees today. I need more charcoal, 2 bags, the
big ones

So what're you eatin?! Oh you gonna make me look under the bun and find
out??

It's not how you stand by your burger, it's how you EAT your burger.

Bull shi* ***hole! no one likes the McTuna sandwich around here!

You almost had me? You never had me. You never had your burger. You're
granny-biting, not double-chomping like you should!!!

Now me and Ronald McDonald here are gonna have to rip open the counter, and
replace the ONION RINGS YOU FRIED.

You know you owe me a 10 pack of nuggets. Ooh. Ouch!

Don't do it! I'll bet he's got at least a triple cheeseburger under that
bun!

Torretto's got ketchup in his veins and an all beef patty for a brain.

They opened my bag. Disrespected my fries. All because someone narked me
out! AND YOU KNOW WHAT!! IT WAS RONALD!!!

I thought we had an understanding? You stay on your side of the play-place,
I stay on mine.

Bryan - "Welcome to Mcdonald's, may I take your order?"
Hector - "Yeah, I made a list. I want 3 of everything."

All the descriptions were the same. 3 black Angus beef patties,
precision-placed pickles, Mushimoto mayonaisse.

I bet a couple of 1/2 pound patties would pull a premium three days before
Taste Wars wouldn't they?

Check it out, it's like this. If I lose, winner takes my happy meal. But If
I win, I take the burger AND the TOY. To some people that's more important.

"the name's hamburglar, got a last name but i can't pronounce it. What's yours?"
"Ronald McDonald"
"Yeah, typical white boy name"

"Fast and the Furious quotes-McDonald's style"

[Peripheral]

hahahaha that's Gold. I love it when people find stuff like that.
I had a copy of the Matrix in computer talk. Pretty good if you're a L337 G33k like some

[indi]

"You can get 400rwkw out of a modified 4ac."

- Laurie

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Monster]

"Bro's before Hoes"

Never put sex before for friends, no matter what your friends will always be there, sex wont

[DRFT - 86]

Originally posted by Loki Boyracer@Nov 25 2005, 09:22 AM
"Bro's before Hoes"

Never put sex before for friends, no matter what your friends will always be there, sex wont
---W>>O>>R>>D---



.................................

From Van' a dodgy audio installer I know...

'ahh yes yes.. very good bass ya.. very good.. quality quality basss.'

[Peripheral]

"Esc, ctrl... alt... WHERE'S THE ANY KEY?"

[DRFT - 86]

Originally posted by Peripheral@Nov 25 2005, 11:20 AM
"Esc, ctrl... alt... WHERE'S THE ANY KEY?"
I have this phat track that uses that as a sample.....
f*** I got heaps of tracks that use simpsons samples actually...

[Peripheral]

"Hanging with Zoo Zoo was like masturbating with a cheese grater. Slightly amusing but mostly painful"

[indi]

That reminds me of a quote from Stephen in 2DMAX in the article about the Monaro, I dont have it with me but it went something like...

"Being beaten by the Monaro was like being beaten to death by the Swedish womens beach volleyball team..... embarassing but not entirely unpleasant."

[indi]

i love u
- fhqwhgadshgnsdhjsdbkhsdabkfabkveybvf

Look fhqwgadshg, can I just call you fhqwhgads? Look fhqwhgads, I'm sorry to say but the feeling's not mutual. Mainly because of your long freakin' name. I mean in the time it took me to say your name I coulda done all kinds of stuff. Like paint a picture of a guy with a big knife….. Whoa, in fact, I'm gonna get started on that right now.

[sic86]

"F*@king Windows 98, Get Bill Gates in Here, You told us Windows 98 would be better, faster and much Improved, Well *BANG*

Cheers

[sic86]

Originally posted by DRFT - 86+Nov 25 2005, 11:56 AM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-Peripheral@Nov 25 2005, 11:20 AM
"Esc, ctrl... alt... WHERE'S THE ANY KEY?"
I have this phat track that uses that as a sample.....
f*** I got heaps of tracks that use simpsons samples actually... [/b]
lol, i use to have them on my school hard drive, use to drive my teacher insane http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/cool.gif

Cheers

[Wally]

this prob been mentioned, but i love the

"No Keyboard Detected

Press F1 to continue"

[mc68]

**do do do** "the finger's you have used to dial, are too fat, if you like to obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now".

[Dorio86]

Originally posted by Alan@Nov 25 2005, 06:38 PM
"F*@king Windows 98, Get Bill Gates in Here, You told us Windows 98 would be better, faster and much Improved, Well *BANG*

Cheers
People are allowed to puff, so dont believe in anything.

[Crab-86]

On 'clutches'

'Kick it like you dont want the baby' http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Peripheral]

On a Taiwanese picnic rug

"Not to be used for protection against tornado's"

[verm69]

from 'napoleon dynamite'

Deb:
What are you drawing?

Napoleon:
A liger.

Deb:
What's a liger?

Napoleon:
It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed. Bred for its skills in magic.

Deb:
Hmm.


IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE.... WATCH IT!!!!!!!!! fricken awesome!!

[ae86]

how awesome is his dance at the end!!!!!!
one of the funniest movies http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Wally]

great movie... one of them "wtf...o_O" movies

[SEXY 16]

get your hand out off there before i p155 on it

[RedSuns]

NAPOLEON DYNAMITE IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER MADE FULLSTOP ... .
"kif! why'd you have to go and eat all the friggin chips!"
"napoleon you're just jealous because ive been chatting online with babes ALL DAY"

[Blood Child]

vote for pedro

[Peripheral]

"are you gonna eat your tots?"

[verm69]

Don:
Hey, Napoleon, what'd you do all last summer again?

Napoleon:
I told you. I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines.

Don:
Did you shoot any?

Napoleon:
Yes, like 50 of 'em. They kept tryin' to attack my cousins. What the heck would you do in a situation like that?

Don:
What kind of gun did you use?

Napoleon:
A frickin' 12-gauge. What do you think?

[verm69]

Napoleon:
Hey, could I use your guys's phone for a sec?

Receptionist:
Is there anything wrong?

Napoleon:
I don't feel very good.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Kip:
Hi

Napoleon:
Is Grandma There?

Kip:
No, she's getting her hair done.

Napoleon:
[Sighs]

Kip:
What do you need?

Napoleon:
Can you just go get her for me?

Kip:
I'm really busy right now.

Napoleon:
Well, just tell her to come get me.

Kip:
Why?

Napoleon:
'Cause I don't feel good.

Kip:
Well, have you talked to the school nurse?

Napoleon:
No, she doesn't know anything. Will you just come get me?

Kip:
No.

Napoleon:
Well, will you do me a favor then?

Kip:
What?

Napoleon:
Can you bring me my ChapStick?

Kip:
No, Napoleon

Napoleon:
But my lips hurt real bad.

Kip:
Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has, like, five sticks in her drawer.

Napoleon:
I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko.

Kip:
See ya. [Dial Tone]

Napoleon:
[Groans] Idiot!


ha ha ha ha ha!!! funny funny siht http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Kitten-Trueno]

if a AE86 with a 4AC is a rabid dog, a AE85 with a 3AC would be a rabid dog with one testicle.

[Peripheral]

"It all starts to make sense when you agree that you've hit rock bottom"

[dream2drift]

A long one but it is helping me. hopefully it can be of use to others as well...
Sam Wise Gamgee
"Its like the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered Full of darkness and danger they were and sometimes you didn't want to know the end because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happend? But in the end, its only a passing thing. This shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come."

[dream2drift]

"you! cut my eggs! and you! cut my milk!"

[Wally]

you are what you eat

[dream2drift]

umm...guys...
"what if the hokey pokey really IS what it is all about"

[verm69]

Originally posted by indi@Nov 25 2005, 02:22 PM
i love u
- fhqwhgadshgnsdhjsdbkhsdabkfabkveybvf

Look fhqwgadshg, can I just call you fhqwhgads? Look fhqwhgads, I'm sorry to say but the feeling's not mutual. Mainly because of your long freakin' name. I mean in the time it took me to say your name I coulda done all kinds of stuff. Like paint a picture of a guy with a big knife….. Whoa, in fact, I'm gonna get started on that right now.
ha ha ha!!! homestar!!!

"Widdle Bruder!!!!!"

"I can make it on my own!!"

"OWWWWWW!!! WIDDLE BRUDER!!!!!!"

[dream2drift]

Ron Burgundy: Last time I looked in the dictionary, my name's Ron Burgundy. What's your name?
Brian Fantana: Brian Fantana.
Champ Kind: Champ Kind.
Brick Tamland: Brian Fantana.
Brian Fantana: No, you're Brick.
Brick Tamland: Brian.
Brian Fantana: I'm Brian.
Brick Tamland: Veronica.

[flamingheads]

umm...guys...
"what if the hokey pokey really IS what it is all about"[/b] That sounds like Kelso.

Oh my God! The 59th st bridge!
Maybe it just collapsed on its own?
We can't take that chance!

[mc68]

....you always say that...i want to take a chance!

[Sprinterboy]

In the quiet words of the virgin Mary, come again?

[Sprinterboy]

so you mean like proper f***ed?
yea proper f***ed!

[eastcoastdrifter]

here is a nice sexist one sorry ladies lol

"There is 1 woman whom fate has destined for each of us. If we miss her we are saved"

lol

[Sprinterboy]

Praise Beer!

Our Lager, which art in barrels

Hallowed be thy drink, thy will be drunk
(I will be drunk)

At home as I am in the tavern,

Give us this day our foamy head,

And forgive us our spillages,

As we forgive those who spill against us,

And lead us not into incarceration,

But deliver us from hangovers,

For thine is the beer,

The bitter and lager forever and ever.

Barmen.

[Peripheral]

AnchorMan

"If you were a man I'd punch you. I'd punch you right in the mouth that's what I'd do"

[Wally]

Aussie Aussie Aussie ... .... oi oi oi

[crazy86]

Originally posted by sprinterboy@Dec 12 2005, 04:57 PM
Praise Beer!

Our Lager, which art in barrels

Hallowed be thy drink, thy will be drunk
(I will be drunk)

At home as I am in the tavern,

Give us this day our foamy head,

And forgive us our spillages,

As we forgive those who spill against us,

And lead us not into incarceration,

But deliver us from hangovers,

For thine is the beer,

The bitter and lager forever and ever.

Barmen.
Damn, if that wasnt so damn long, that would be a great one to remember for those late nights "out", Problem is it gets hard enough to recite your own address to the taxi driver, let alone a 12 line preayer to the beer gods http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Monster]

Hachi's are dicks! We're light, underpowered, ugly dicks. And Skylines are pussies. And a Falcadore is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get f***ed by dicks. But dicks also f*** assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can f*** an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they f*** too much or f*** when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us f*** this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!

[Bustin_86]

"Phuck off Bogan"

[dream2drift]

"if you go they'll make you kill that eurasian dude"

aaah, Zoolander, so many lines, trying to limit posts.

[Danish]

"It's all about the heart, the people who focus on parts, turbo's and all that stuff...they're just losers."

-Shinji Minowa (AE86 D1 driver)

[OBE353]

this ones for all the guys dont tell me u havnt had these before http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

"your like a brother to me"

"i think of you as a brother"

"i dont want to ruin our friendship"

stop beating around the bush and just tell me to piss off lol http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[OBE353]

"if i get u in the loop when i make a point to b straight with u then, in leiu of the inuendo, in the end know my intent though, i brazillian wax poetic so pathetically, i dont want to beat around the bush..........Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo

[D34THROW]

"We're streaking! Throught the quad to the gymnasium, Cmon everbody's doing it!"

[sharpie_13]

when the clutch drops, the bullshit stops..

[sic86]

Initial D 'The Movie'
Your not putting that in your car. You want to go to jail?

Cheers

[rb26_n1]

"what seems to be the officer, problem?"

[sic86]

Originally posted by rb26_n1@Dec 25 2005, 08:34 PM
"what seems to be the officer, problem?"
WTF?
Never heard that. Did u do it right?

Cheers

[indi]

"De plane, de plane."
"No, my freakish little friend that's a sea gull"

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[xolent]

Originally posted by Alan+Dec 25 2005, 08:39 PM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-rb26_n1@Dec 25 2005, 08:34 PM
"what seems to be the officer, problem?"
WTF?
Never heard that. Did u do it right?

Cheers [/b]
slow!

it's pretty much like saying

"i swear to drunk i'm not god bro"

[sic86]

How about?
1 million dollars
or sharks with freakin laser beams attached to their heads

Cheers

[RobertoX]

'Im not a businessman, i am a BUSINESS, man, just let me handle my business, damn!'

'difficult takes a day, impossible takes a week...'

Jay - Z

'All eyes on me like the face of 'pac was on my jewelery'

Pumkin Head

Chris: you are such a f***ing noob!
Me: why exactly am i noob?
Chris: umm, because you are new..??!!??

Number plate reads
ON DA RUN

Henry: Who the f*** is 'ondarren?'

Me to Dwayne, dude you arent running oil??

Dwayne: yeah all a blocks seem to run better with out it

Random noob at drift track
If you dont have a tach how do you know when to change gears

when the interior rattle gets too annoying

Random noob at drift track

what do 4k's run on

me: anything flamable

Me after looking at the temp guage on 120 degrees at the drift track

one more lap...she'll be right...

Corey after hitting a gutter at about 40kms

"i think it is straight now"

jimmy

Jimmy: 10 kilo springs should be ok on stock shocks, yeah?

ME: NO!

My Gf to eminem shirt wearing wigga who tried to grope her

"now i know why wiggas dont get laid"

Douche Bag to my GF

Douche bag: Your shorts would look really good laying next to my bed...

GF: Your budgie smugglers would look really good up around your ears after i wedgie you!

that will do for now

[dream2drift]

some song i heard on the radio;
"sometimes i forget i am awake. i f**k up and say things out loud."

[poh_86]

Ben Stiller:"what is this?? A SCHOOL FOR ANTS?! it must be...3 times bigger than this!!"
Will Farell*pauses*: he's absolutely right!


"nice one brother!, I SAID NICE ONE BROTHER!!"

[ae86]

i said... nice bruv!!!!!

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif human traffic?

[ae71neo]

yeah human traffic, mad movie.

"I want a god damn litre of cola!" (not human traffic of course)

[indi]

"Our lives begin to end when we become silent about the things that matter" -

Martin Luther King (printed on my Amnesty International T-shirt)

[Monk]

"Real men Piss in Sinks"

[Dorio86]

I dont want to be a parrot but http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

"Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, and kill them"

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die." ~Mel Brooks

"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it"

"Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much"


"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."

[starion]

Here's a one from my school days.
me and a mate used to talk sh!t about nothing to piss the teacher off.
metal work teach giving lector about using the a mig welder.
Teacher: so you have to always wear the welding masks....
Mate: like down ball sir
Teacher:....what??
Me: you know down ball, like tennis but with a man size ball and no rackets
Teacher: I know what down ball is but where'd it come from!?
Me: well it started back in 1820 by sir john down ball
Mate: yeah we did a paper on this, they used the heads of thief's but they called it jacking off.....
Me: really!!
Teacher: get out!!

[E V A N]

Originally posted by starion@Jan 9 2006, 10:47 AM
Here's a one from my school days.
me and a mate used to talk sh!t about nothing to piss the teacher off.
metal work teach giving lector about using the a mig welder.
Teacher: so you have to always wear the welding masks....
Mate: like down ball sir
Teacher:....what??
Me: you know down ball, like tennis but with a man size ball and no rackets
Teacher: I know what down ball is but where'd it come from!?
Me: well it started back in 1820 by sir john down ball
Mate: yeah we did a paper on this, they used the heads of thief's but they called it jacking off.....
Me: really!!
Teacher: get out!!
hahaha

school was so fun! Mischeif all the time.

[starion]

Heres one of my favs its from euro trip:
scott: I'm in love with mika
coop: Oh.....i knew this would happen and i'm glad you chose me to come out to and don't worry about your parents i think they already know
scott: no you idiot mika is a girl..
coop: No, i get it, first your the girl then he's the girl.....then your both the girl....thats hot

[rb26_n1]

eurotrip's the shit man, luv it.

"me scuzy, me scuzy....."

[Peripheral]

"I've had nothing between my legs that don't run on batteries in over a yr"

- Kaylee from Firefly

[Monster]

"All your life you are told the things you cannot do.

All your life they will say you're not good enough or strong enough or talented enough; they will say you're the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this.

THEY WILL TELL YOU NO, a thousand times no, until all the no's become meaningless.

All your life they will tell you no, quite firmly and very quickly.

AND YOU WILL TELL THEM YES."

[poh_86]

i just thought of an idea so great that if i even began to think about it my mind would explode

peter griffin - family guy

[indi]

My mum "Don't you slow down for corners?!"
Me "Why? I drive a Sprinter!" http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

My shooting instructor "Here try the Glock, you'll love it, you have that whole Lara Croft look happening." http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

My shooting instructor after a burning hot bullet casing spits out the back of the Glock and somehow lands down my pants "Oh yeah I forgot to mention its not a good idea to wear hipster cargo pants when you're using the Glock..... low cut tops aren't a good idea either." http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/dry.gif

[crazy86]

Originally posted by indi@Jan 10 2006, 10:51 AM
My shooting instructor after a burning hot bullet casing spits out the back of the Glock and somehow lands down my pants "Oh yeah I forgot to mention its not a good idea to wear hipster cargo pants when you're using the Glock..... low cut tops aren't a good idea either." http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/dry.gif
the sicko was probably waiting for that to happen http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[indi]

Originally posted by CRAZY86@Jan 10 2006, 09:53 AM
the sicko was probably waiting for that to happen http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif
LOL probably oh well at least the scar that it left in a place not often seen by the general public got me into the premiere of the Vin Diesel movie "XXX" and a chance to meet Mr Diesel in person..... but that's another story http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

[mattysshop]

'i will take your mother Dorithy Mantooth out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again'

and just this saturday gone..

Sgt XXXXXXXXX - "So Mathew, got a bit of a weight reduction there (pointing torch to lack of beack seat)
Me - "for sure mate, every Kilo counts right?"
Sgt XXXXXXXXX - "ok then..have a good night"
Me - "phew" http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif

[aaaaah]

Originally posted by Mattysshop@Jan 10 2006, 11:10 AM
Sgt XXXXXXXXX - "So Mathew, got a bit of a weight reduction there (pointing torch to lack of beack seat)
Me - "for sure mate, every Kilo counts right?"
Sgt XXXXXXXXX - "ok then..have a good night"
Me - "phew" http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif
hahaha thats great http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[E V A N]

Geez sgt XXXX is a champ!

[mattysshop]

lucky for him... as i was gonna pull out ma 9 and bust a cap in his ass...

jokes.. much respect for the police

[mc68]

Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'
Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.

[starion]

Family guy rocks i have s1,2,3 on DVD look for s4
Glen Quagmire my hero LOL Giggidy, giggidy, gig-gi-dy!


Quagmire (runs outside in a robe): Hey guys, what's going on? I was just jerki ... ed out of a deep sleep.

Peter: If you could be stranded on a desert island with any woman in the world, who would it be?
Quagmire: Taylor Hanson.
Joe Swanson: Taylor Hanson is a guy.
Quagmire: [Laughs] You guys are yankin' me. "Hey, let's put one over on Quagmire."
Peter: No, he's actually a guy, Quagmire.
Quagmire: What? That's insane. That's impossible.
[Pause]
Quagmire: Oh God. Oh my God. I've got all these magazines. Oh God.

Quagmire: I felt guilty once, but she woke up halfway through.

Quagmire: My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did giggittygiggiydoo that girl. I gashmogied her gaflabity with my googus. And I am sorry.

TELEVISION ANNOUNCER: We now return to the Smurfs...
(on television screen)
Smurf #1: Hey, did you have a good time last night?
Smurf #2: Smurf-tacular!
Smurf #1: Yeah, I saw you leave with Smurfette.
Smurf #2: Oh man, as soon as we got out of the bar, she started smurfing me.
Smurf #1: Shut the Smurf up!
Smurf #2: Yeah!
Smurf #1: Right in the Smurfing parking lot?
Smurf #2: Smurf-Yeah!
Smurf #1: Oh! That is freaking Smurf

[mattysshop]

Originally posted by starion@Jan 11 2006, 11:10 AM
Quagmire: My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did giggittygiggiydoo that girl. I gashmogied her gaflabity with my googus. And I am sorry.
baaaaaahhhhh ha ha ha...

Quagmire - does this look like a Q?

allllriiiiight...

[dream2drift]

some 'Mr Blackwell' guy writes a list each year of the worst dressed, Britanny Spears won but this is what he said of Renee Zellweger.

Zellweger looks like "a painted pumpkin on a pogo stick."

[ae86]

starion i have season 1,2,3 of family guy on dvd, plus the 'freaking sweet collection' and the 'family guy christmas' dvd's too.. i also downloaded the family guy movie and season 4... and have started downloading season5.. i have about 4 eps http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif
family guy kicks ass...!

Peter Griffin (narrating his life): "I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life. (Lois knocks Peter out.)
I woke several hours later in a daze."

[dream2drift]

The Emperor's New Groove

Ezma (Emperors Advisor) talking to a peasant

Ezma: It's no fault of mine you haven't got any...what was it?
Peasant: Food
Ezma: HA! You should've thought of THAT before you became peasants.

[starion]

from 'napoleon dynamite'

Deb:
What are you drawing?

Napoleon:
A liger.

Deb:
What's a liger?

Napoleon:
It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed. Bred for its skills in magic.

Deb:
Hmm.


IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE.... WATCH IT!!!!!!!!! fricken awesome[/b]

I just went an got this movie out let hope its as good as yous say.

also heard one of my fav quotes while in the video store:



When you buy a pirated DVD the only people profiting are professional criminals.[/b]

WTF???? how many "professional criminals" still live with there mum surfing the net only eating 2 minute noodles.
I think you'll make a nice profit when buying a DVD for $5 as apposed to $50 hell that's $45 i wouldn't otherwise have.

[sharpie_13]

A friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "we fuked up this time"

[rb26_n1]

i was flipping through sum car mags and the japs really think of wonderful quotes to stick on to the seats.

"fortune favours the brave"
"keep attacking the nurburgring"

thought it b cool to post this. hahah. http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

[Monk]

" take that dick off your shoulder and put it in your mouth "

[Wally]

Originally posted by Monk@Jan 15 2006, 03:25 PM
" take that dick off your shoulder and put it in your mouth "
sounds like some gay porno... http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/rolleyes.gif

[Monk]

its actually grom a dr. dre / snoop dogg song

[sharpie_13]

enough said

[ae71neo]

"Donny, you're out of your element!"

"you are entering a world of pain"

Guess what movie those are from..

[aaaaah]

Anything Terry Tate says.

[dori_86]

"it seems my crouch has been struck with a bit of riga mortice"

stewy (family guy)

[Sprinterboy]

Originally posted by sharpie_13@Jan 14 2006, 06:15 PM
A friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "we fuked up this time"
GOLD, I've been both! so what does that make me???

[Jessi]

Originally posted by CRAZY86+Nov 24 2005, 03:19 PM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-indi@Nov 24 2005, 02:04 PM
Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?
Now, I know this one...... but where from!!!! I Cant Remember!!!! [/b]
Bulletproof monk. The monk to Sean William Scotts character

[indi]

I got it from Animaniacs.

[starion]

Neapolitan: Do Chickens have large talons

[sharpie_13]

Originally posted by sprinterboy+Jan 16 2006, 02:12 AM-->
<!--QuoteBegin-sharpie_13@Jan 14 2006, 06:15 PM
A friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "we fuked up this time"
GOLD, I've been both! so what does that make me??? [/b]
u got me there http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/blink.gif

[dream2drift]

Originally posted by starion@Jan 16 2006, 11:37 AM
Neapolitan: Do Chickens have large talons
dude... http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif that is an ice cream flavours
forgiven though http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif

chicken guy: do they have what?
Napoleon : large talons.
chicken guy: I don't understand a word you just said ()proceeds to drink eggs)

[dori_86]

Napoleon: gosh, you idiot!

Napoleon: girls like guys with skill, ...i need skills!
Pedro: Your like the best drawer i know
Napoleon: Yeah i know!

Napoleon: i took me, like three hours just to shade your upper lip, it's probly the best drawing i've done ever
(while giving a demented shaded drawing of her face to the girl)

[starion]

Haha dam spell check, Napoleon then.


Pedro: do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon: heck yes i would
Pedro: but what skills do i have?
Napoleon:well you have a sick bike, and your pretty good at hooking up with chicks...plus your the only guy in high school with a moustache
Pedro: that's true
Napoleon: if you need to use any of my skills you can, I'll do anything
Pedro: if i become the school president then you can be my secretary or something
Napoleon: Awesome!!

[starion]

For all the napoleon fans

http://www.wimp.com/napoleon/

[selk]

"treat others the way u liked to be treated"

[crazy86]

Thou shal not steal http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/rolleyes.gif

[RobertoX]

in my mates 550cc alto kei car....

we were getting a parking fine for parking in a motorbike park...

dickhead parking inspector..

"you guys are f***ing morons, what the hell do you think you are doing? are you stupid, does it look like a motor bike to you?"

me: "well it has a motor bike motor"

DH: huh?

so funny at the time, but we got a $30 fine
lol

[poh_86]

"i broke the dam"

[ae71neo]

"No, i broke the dam"

[poh_86]

hehe i broke the dam *cartman*

glad to see theres a few people who watched it last night http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

[86WANNABE]

A garden bed without flowers is like a life without dreams.

[ae71neo]

"Its -700 thousand degrees outside"

[Revan]

To live life you've got to learn to jump off cliffs...but in order to really learn life - you've got to jump off cliffs all the time, and build your wings on the way down.

[crazy86]

When in Rome........ http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/rolleyes.gif

[ae71neo]

haha i know that...shit, whats that from?

[ae86]

Youre damned if you do, and youre damned if you dont.

[crazy86]

Anchorman http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/wink.gif

[ae71neo]

Thats it! http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[selk]

"street racers dont need girlfriends"

[ae86]

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Micknofx]

'We will raise you planets tempurate by 1,000,000 degrees every day for 5 days unless you give us Mc'Neal' -Lurr, ruler of omnicron persei 8

[aaaaah]

i bent my wookie http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/sad.gif

[selk]

"strap urself in & feel the g's"

[ae86]

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

"Nobody snuggles with Max Power ... you strap yourself in and feel the G's"

[selk]

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif lol
"tha doctor said my nose wouldnt bleed as much if I kept my finger outta there"

[aaaaah]

there are 3 ways to do things, the right way, the wrong way and the max power way!

isn't that just the wrong way?

yes, but faster!

[dream2drift]

saw it on the back of a car "turbos are nice but i'd rather be blown" not sure if i understand it properly...(insert confused face)

[aaaaah]

blown means its supercharged http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif

either that or he would prefer a blowjob

[dream2drift]

my first thought was blowjob but i figured (or hoped) there was a car meaning to it. thanks for the clarification http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif

[selk]

Originally posted by aaaaah@Jan 26 2006, 08:20 PM
there are 3 ways to do things, the right way, the wrong way and the max power way!

isn't that just the wrong way?

yes, but faster!
damn http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif ROFL





"doesnt matter if u win by an inch or a mile, winning is winning"

"I live my life a quarter mile at a time "

lol

[eastcoastdrifter]

"A recod laptime From a Car that Yielded Standard Turbos and Full Trim? thats more than an insult to injury. thats pure, unadulterated Humiliation." the Rotary tuning Legend Isami Amemiya

[eastcoastdrifter]

“Give a man a fish; you have fed him for today. Teach a man to fish; and you have fed him for a lifetime"

[TRD-86]

PENIS BUTTER AND VAGINAMITE !!

[Blood Child]

You give a man a fish, he eats for a day. You teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. If you ever, ever try to teach Chuck Norris about fishing then he will use your testicles as bait.

[starion]

It smells like fresh vagina in here[/b]

[KAWAII_hachi_roku]

Originally posted by eastcoastdrifter@Feb 20 2006, 11:53 PM
"A recod laptime From a Car that Yielded Standard Turbos and Full Trim? thats more than an insult to injury. thats pure, unadulterated Humiliation." the Rotary tuning Legend Isami Amemiya
re rx7 artical in autosalon?

[20vtouge86]

All my friends and i standing around my mates Cosmo at a drag day...
Young Noob lookin guy walks up...
"Nice you should put a 13b turbo in it tho...."
Everyone goes really quiet, young guy leaves...BAHAHAHAHAHA we break out in fits of laughter http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

[aaaaah]

Originally posted by 20vtouge86@Feb 21 2006, 11:19 PM
All my friends and i standing around my mates Cosmo at a drag day...
Young Noob lookin guy walks up...
"Nice you should put a 13b turbo in it tho...."
Everyone goes really quiet, young guy leaves...BAHAHAHAHAHA we break out in fits of laughter http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif
bahahahahahaha http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[ae86hachiroku]

"ya nanna"
"ya mum"

what classics.. bahahha

Ken

[eastcoastdrifter]

1 out of 10 chance off pulling this off

10 out of 10 people die

I like my odds

[dream2drift]

dream girl : Take me Garth!
Garth: okay but i am low on gas and you need a jacket.

waynes world 2

[Blood Child]

it's got a better warranty. it won't break, even if an elephant steps on it. probably

[verm69]

Chris: Hey Meg, Try to guess the word in my head... and it's not kitty...

Meg: i dont' know... Banana?

Chris: AH HA HA! it's kitty!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[on the phone]
Chris: So, what are you wearing?
[pause]
Chris: Wow. I bet you can see right through that.
Lois: Chris, who are you talking to?
Chris: Grandma.

[dream2drift]

Chris: Hey Meg, Try to guess the word in my head... and it's not kitty...

Meg: i dont' know... Banana?

Chris: AH HA HA! it's kitty!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[on the phone]
Chris: So, what are you wearing?
[pause]
Chris: Wow. I bet you can see right through that.
Lois: Chris, who are you talking to?
Chris: Grandma.[/b]


http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif i think you watched the episode that i did the other night. i love the family guy http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/smile.gif

[Wezz]

im sensing a real lack of hunter s thompson in here..

"can't stop here this is bat country"

if you dont know what im talking about get "fear and loathing in las vegas", the book or the movie, both are great!

also
"ingnorance is bliss "

[SprinterTRD]

"Theres no such thing as an ugly woman,,, its just that some are better than others"

[Vance]

here is a nice sexist one sorry ladies lol

"There is 1 woman whom fate has destined for each of us. If we miss her we are saved"

lol[/b]


bahaha thats a winner.



few simpsons ones.

Homer: Hi i'm Max Power.

Trent Steele: Hey great name Max

Homer: Thanks i got it off a hair drier.


Calm down Nedilidilyidly, They did there best shodidilyidily.

Gotta be nice, hospilidilidilyidi-oh HELL DIDILY DING DONG CRAP!! CANT YOU MORONS DO ANYTHING RIGHT?!



Hello, could i trouble you for a drink?

Get out of here Homer.

Homer? Who is Homer? My name is Guy Incognito...

[ae86]

a quote i heard on a random tv show last week i thought was cool..

"Never wound something you cant kill."

[Klutch]

The internet is serious business.

[Blood Child]

"You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think"

[KAWAII_hachi_roku]

a quote i heard on a random tv show last week i thought was cool..

"Never wound something you cant kill."[/b]
LOL !!! http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[Jesse86]

from chappelle show the p.diddy episode

p.diddy :" You cant just choke all your problems away.if i had my own way i'd just stay home all day watch scarface 50 times, eat a turkey sandwich and have sex all day f**king day and then i'd dress up like a clown and suprise kids at schools.Then i'd take a dump in the back of a movie theater and just wait till somebody sit in it ...just to hear it squish"

p.diddy :"alright the only way i'll open the studio up now,yall gotta walk up town to the bronx and get breast milk from a cambodian immagrint...i only drink the finest breast milks"

[sharpie_13]

Homer: Hi i'm Max Power.

Trent Steele: Hey great name Max

Homer: Thanks i got it off a hair drier.[/b]
lol
i luv that
it took me so long to get it too i thought max power must have been a brand name i didnt get that it ment maximum power gosh im so stupid but its still mad

[xero]

"theres always a way.... "

francine: " hows your french toast dear?"
stan: smelly and ungrateful... but this american toast is great!"

ron burgandy: " you know what im going to punch you right in the ovaries, yep, right in the ol' baby maker..."

[selk]

"never touch a black man's radio boy"

[xero]

homer: "this isn't one of those foney baloney get rich quick schemes, this time i know ill get rich!... and quick!.."

bart: " dad do you even have a job anymore?"
homer: " i think its obvious i dont..."

[selk]

"chinese bamboo, very very strong"

[boosted86]

Homer:"Marge, can i get a duck"

Marge:"You already have a monkey"

Homer:"....can he get a duck"

[ae86_kiwi]

"Aahhh, they have the internet on computers now" - Homer

Yet another Simpsons Quote.

[boosted86]

"On one of my many trips to the ground, i noticed Malloy wore sneakers...for sneaking"

[boosted86]

"Hi Lisa, hi super nintendo chalmers..... i'm learnding"

ralph's a crack up http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif

[xero]

" the internet? is that thing still around?..."

[rthy]

"is it ripe? can i squeeze it?"

[boosted86]

"That's my swing set, that's my sand box....i'm not allowed to go in the deep end.....and that's where i saw the leprichaun ....he told me to burn things"

"There you go little girl"
"I'm a boy"
"That's the spirit, never give up"

"I eated the purple berries"
"How do they taste, good"
"They taste like...burning"

[selk]

"me fail english thats impossible"

[sharpie_13]

"hes sweating more than a pedafile at a wiggles concert"
dunno were the hell thats from lol

[boosted86]

playing the pokies is like having unprotected sex, if you dont pull out in time you'll blow the lot

[FLT LNR]

"aerodynamics is for people who can't build engines" - the late Enzo Ferrari

[selk]

"people who live in glass house's shouldnt throw rocks"

[anastasios]

havin showers in glass houses would be awkward

[Blood Child]

havin showers in glass houses would be awkward[/b]
BAH! that's the only reason i would ever consider getting a glass house http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/2thumbs.gif

[selk]

hopefully the girl next door lives in a glass house http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[killjoy112]

pulls harder than a 15 year old with cable porn http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/tongue.gif

[selk]

lol
"..thats the max power way"
"isnt that tha wrong way"
"yes but wit style"
fr the simspons i fink (correct me)

[Konakid]

(Stewie from family guy)

" I say, Eminem and 50 Cent wouldn't know a proper lyric if it crawled up their arses and brought them to orgasm through prostate stimulation"

[Beserker99]

BYAHHH!!! - Dave Chappelle

[driftae86]

lol
"..thats the max power way"
"isnt that tha wrong way"
"yes but wit style"
fr the simspons i fink (correct me)[/b]

i think its

......"yes, but faster"

-homer simpson

[mech`s blue]

"the only thing you can trust in life is to not trust anything"

[sprinter_adam]

" U like to party? climb up my leg and have a ball "

[selk]

<{POST_SNAPBACK}> (index.php?act=findpost&pid=244926)

lol
"..thats the max power way"
"isnt that tha wrong way"
"yes but wit style"
fr the simspons i fink (correct me)[/b]

i think its

......"yes, but faster"

-homer simpson
[/b]

cheers

[PuGZoR]

From Scrubs:

Dr. Cox: Oh, I don't know, Bob. Here, I like to think I've accomplished plenty of things much more difficult than this. Why, just yesterday morning I somehow managed to hack into your voice-mail and change the outgoing message to, [slips into an excellent Kelso voice] "Hi, this is Big Bob. Why, I'm not in right now but, at the beep, leave your name and your penis size!"

Dr. Kelso: Perry, have you ever wondered why you've never risen above clinical staff at this hospital? I mean, come on, pal, who do you think the board listens to concerning promotions around here? Why don't I tell you after the beep?

Dr. Steadman: Beeeeeeep.

Dr. Kelso: Bob Kelso. Ten inches.

Kelso walks off; Steadman follows after, stopping only to clarify to Dr. Cox....

Dr. Steadman: It's like a baguette.

Never ceases to make me laugh.

[lo_rolla]

This is from a friend of mine during a some what...interesting(?) conversation:

"As if you'd film yourself jacking off. I mean, I'd do it, but...."

[selk]

Ralph- "i saw principle skinner & miss krabappel making babies, i saw one & it looked at me"

[Dems]

"my Datsun 210 will be a drag demon and a monster for drifting."

[boosted86]

Ralph- "i saw principle skinner & miss krabappel making babies, i saw one & it looked at me"[/b]

the baby looked at you? - Chief Wiggum

[selk]

lol
'sara get me super nintendo chamers" ....sara wiggum puts in the number ......
"i love u sara"
lol

[boosted86]

Marge-"I dont want to snuggle with Max Power"

Homer-"Nobody snuggles with Max Power, you strap your self in and
feel the G's

[prosbo]

"You Do Twat With Chickens?!"

and somthing my brother inlaw always says when drunk.
"You got a pritty mouth for a fa66et"

[selk]

"alright son im taking u to hooters"
nelson- " i dont want to bother mum at work"

[GAKI86]

"My Toyota Is Great!!!"

Its Truth.. http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[dirty_86]

Steve- "its just like rays room except we cnt smoke in here and theres not foxtel"
jace- " THIS AINT LIKE RAYS ROOM AT ALL!"

[mrbigport]

Me: Hey bro, check out Chasers its funny ass. It's on fridays, 9:30 on ABC
Jace: Cool.. what day is it on again?
Me: Friday
Jace: What time wassit?
Me: 9:30
Jace: What channel is it on?
Me: ABC http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/dry.gif

That was just like homer asking what VIP stood for >_<

[dirty_86]

jace : what colors the blue wire!

[FLT LNR]

Shooter McGavin: I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast

Happy Gilmore: You eat PIECES OF SHIT... for breakfast?????

Shooter McGavin: ..............................................NO!! !! I.... <storms off>

[mattysshop]

'The hidiousness of that foot.. will haunt my dreams... forever...'

[stinger_007]

Suprise C@ckfags!!

- Team America -

[20vtouge86]

Talking to a mate with an FC RX7:

What the hell was your car revving out to?!!

I don't know... the tacho only goes to 9...

http://www.ae86drivingclub.com.au/forums/emoticons/laugh.gif